Weightloss for men - BMW 3-Series Forum (F30 / F32)

schneid4323 · 10-19-2007, 03:48 PM

Weight Loss Program for Him

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss
program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a
voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of
Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck. She introduces herself as
a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can
catch me, you can have me." Without a second thought, he takes off after
her. A few miles later huffing and puffing, he finally gives up. The
same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens. On
the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10
lbs. as promised. He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound
program.

The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the
most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She
is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck
that reads, "If you catch me you can have me".

Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent
shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the next four days,
the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better
shape.

Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he
discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised. He decides to go
for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program "Are
you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most
rigorous program."

"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years." The next
day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge
muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a
sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, your ass is mine."

He lost 63 pounds that week.

Stole that from bimmerforums

1001 · 10-19-2007, 05:21 PM

HAHA

Kiemyster · 10-19-2007, 05:30 PM

HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!

thats just great! i wonder if i can order that last one for a friend... hmmmmm lol!

just4kickz · 10-19-2007, 05:41 PM

this is pretty old... i heard it when i was like in 6th grade... so like 9 years ago

!Xoible · 10-19-2007, 05:42 PM

it's old, but funny still

schneid4323 · 10-19-2007, 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kiemyster

HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!

thats just great! i wonder if i can order that last one for a friend... hmmmmm lol!

lol

Revlis · 10-19-2007, 07:22 PM

I'd just order the second package three----Thirty times...

Ru$$ell · 10-19-2007, 07:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kiemyster

HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!

thats just great! i wonder if i can order that last one for a friend... hmmmmm lol!

lmao,not cool man!

Year's_End · 10-20-2007, 04:24 AM

I'd order that first package, get ready at the door and leap out as soon as it swings open. Wouldn't know what hit 'em.

10-19-2007, 03:48 PM	#1
schneid4323 Banned Drives: 335i, M6 Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Dallas TX Posts: 1,135 iTrader: (0)	Weightloss for men Weight Loss Program for Him A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program. The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me." Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later huffing and puffing, he finally gives up. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. as promised. He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program. The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me". Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape. Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program "Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years." The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, your ass is mine." He lost 63 pounds that week. Stole that from bimmerforums
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10-19-2007, 05:30 PM	#3
Kiemyster Bimmerpost Resident Marijuana Consultant Drives: E90x4 (M3, 335xi, 325xi,320i) Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Queens/NYC Posts: 3,081 iTrader: (2) Garage List 2006 BMW E90 325xi [0.00] 2011 BMW E90 335xi [0.50] 2011 BMW M3 E90 [3.50] 2006 E90 320i [0.00]	HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!! thats just great! i wonder if i can order that last one for a friend... hmmmmm lol! __________________ "AMG What! S-Line Who? If you ain't got that M I got no respect for you!" '06 Alpine Weiss E90 320i \| '06 The Green Machine E90 325xi \| '11 Alpine Weiss E90 M3 ZCP \| '10 Silverstone X5M \| '11 Alpine Weiss E90 335xi

10-19-2007, 05:41 PM	#4
just4kickz boku no namae ha... Drives: 2006 BS 330i Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: S. Bay Area, CA + Newark, NJ Posts: 10,592 iTrader: (11) Garage List 2006 E90 330i [0.00]	this is pretty old... i heard it when i was like in 6th grade... so like 9 years ago __________________ looking for a PreLCI Black Sapphire e90 front bumper without license plate holes "Akimbo shotguns. Broken wrists anyone? And don't give me that 'it's just a game' bull**. Where the are my akimbo interventions then?! One scope on each eye mother**er!!"

10-19-2007, 07:22 PM	#7
Revlis Now With 33% MORE Sarcasm Free! Drives: 335si Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Seattle Area, WA Posts: 3,149 iTrader: (0)	I'd just order the second package three----Thirty times... __________________ INBOUND ETA 6/13 '13 TiAg over Coral, 335is \| DCT \| Prem \| L7 \| Nav/Idrive \| CA \| 19" "-------" A BMW is Just a Car, it doesn't make you smart, handsome, cool, or wealthy. Get over it.

10-20-2007, 04:24 AM	#9
Year's_End Cpt. Buzzkill Drives: '08 E92 335i Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: St. Pete, FL Posts: 11,788 iTrader: (0)	I'd order that first package, get ready at the door and leap out as soon as it swings open. Wouldn't know what hit 'em. __________________ _.[In a love/hate relationship with...] E92 335i: Space Grey\|Coral Red\|Aluminum Trim _________VMR V710s\|M-Sport Rear Bumper & Rockers\|M3 Spoiler\|Golf-T__________Moved on to the misc. Later, brahs.

10-19-2007, 05:21 PM	#2
1001 Captain Drives: 06' 325i/08' 350z/09' 128i Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: San francisco Posts: 830 iTrader: (0)	HAHA

10-19-2007, 05:42 PM	#5
!Xoible Banned Drives: .... Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: . Posts: 46,045 iTrader: (4) Garage List 2008 M3 [3.50] 2007 335i [4.50] 2008 528i [4.00] 2006 Infiniti - G35 ... [4.00]	it's old, but funny still

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